Forever Took to Find
by Damara
Summary: [MaxLiz] Ever since that afternoon in the Crashdown, things have changed between them…and every day their connection is becoming more intense. Refusing to deny it any longer, Liz decides it’s time to make Max believe it too…
1. Prologue

**Title: Forever Took to Find **

**Author: Stephanie (AKA Damara)**

**Rating: K+**

**Disclaimer: I do not claim any ownership of the characters contained herein, they belong to Jason Katims, the WB (shame on you!) and the UPN (shame on you too!).**

**_Spoilers:_ **Set just after the Pilot

**_Summary: _**Ever since that afternoon in the Crashdown, things have changed between them…and every day their connection is becoming more intense. Refusing to deny it any longer, Liz decides it's time to make Max believe it too…

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Prologue

Journal Entry --- September 27, 1999

_It's only 8 days ago that Max Evans brought me back from death, but it feels like so much longer. It all seems like such a distant memory to me now, almost like it didn't happen. But I know it did. I was helpless as my life slipped away from me and I lay in my own blood. And amazingly, just when I'd given up hope I heard him calling out to me, "**Liz you have to look at me**," he'd begged. I'll never forget the way his voice sounded that day; it held a deep desperation that I'd never heard before, probably never will again. And while I'd not understood why he risked everything in those few precious seconds, I knew somehow that he'd do it all again if it meant keeping me safe. See, that's the unbelievable thing about Max, he can make you feel everything he feels without ever using words. You see it in his eyes, in the way that he moves his lips and how that drives you crazy; you see it in his face, in the way he pierces your soul with his stare. He can convey every human emotion with just one look. And unexpectedly, the last few days have shown me something beautiful about Max Evans. Something totally ironic and illogical, yet true nonetheless: he's an alien from another planet, but I've never known a person more genuine in their humanity. _

_Okay…so, that being said, I'm faced with the inevitable question…what next? I mean we agreed we couldn't get involved right? We're too different. But the thing is…I just don't believe that anymore. The truth is...that if there's one thing I'm quickly learning, it's that if there's anything harder than accepting the existence of aliens in Roswell, it's stopping yourself from falling in love with one…_

_It sounds simple enough…but as strange as it sounds…it's the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life. It's been over a week now since that day in the Crashdown, and amazingly, somehow I've felt incredibly drawn to Max. Just like a moth to a flame, I'm just unconsciously connected to him; it's a connection that seems stronger now than it ever did before. In the day, when I know he's far away, and even at night in my dreams…I can feel him. I can't control this feeling…this urge to just curl up into his arms and wrap myself around him. _

_Something inside of me is aching…and I just don't know how to make it stop. _

_And the more I fight these feelings that I keep hidden deep in my soul, the more I realize that I don't want to fight them at all. I want to be consumed by them. I want to be consumed by **him**…Max Evans.

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Any thoughts? Chapter 1 coming tomorrow...stay tuned :oP


	2. Chapter One

**Chapter One**

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Today had already been excruciatingly long, and now it just seemed to be dragging on for endless seconds.

Liz quickly decided that she'd sat through far too many scholarly lectures today. Today hadn't started out any different from any other school wise, it just felt that way.

_Or it could just be the fact that today's the day you've promised yourself you're going to talk to Max and tell him how you really feel! Yeah that's probably it. Definitely sounds more logical than some school wide conspiracy_…she thought with a tight smile.

What on earth was she going to say to Max when she saw him? What words would she use? How would she even get him to talk to her…especially now that getting him alone was becoming harder and harder these days? She could just see one awful disaster after another play out in her head.

It was true that they'd agreed to keep their distance whenever possible, if for no other reason than to divert suspicion…even though she was sure she had caught Max watching her on more than one occasion in the last few days. Each time she sensed his gaze on her she would slowly turn towards him to see if he was actually watching her. And each time she caught him she smiled when he'd quickly turn his eyes toward the floor as if he'd suddenly found something interesting there.

The fact of the matter was that to her, Max Evans was irresistible, especially in moments like those. And most especially, because he was consistently clueless to the fact that girls all over Roswell High practically drooled over him on a daily basis…herself included. For some reason though, he'd never shown any interest in anyone. Of course Liz knew now that the real reason for that lay in his secret alien status.

And now…actually ever since that afternoon he'd saved her, she couldn't help but remember, and even repeat over and over in her mind the things he'd told her. Since that first moment they'd made a connection she saw things about Max Evans that she knew he'd never let anyone else see.

He showed her things in their connection…feelings….that she just couldn't avoid nor deny. He'd allow her see how he'd always admired her from a distance. She'd been able to feel the emotions he'd felt when he saw her.

_It was beautiful. _

At the time, things had just been so crazy that she just chose to push everything to the back of her mind. And after Max decided that they could never share anything beyond friendship, she'd tried her best to ignore it.

But she could never ignore it.

Especially not after everything that had happened since that night. And certainly not since she'd realized everything he'd put on the line to save her life. His reply the day she questioned him always lingered in her mind, day and night…

"_It was you…"_

It sounded crazy she knew, but those three simple words had changed her whole life. And admittedly it wasn't even just those words that had her completely thrown. It was the way he answered her…without even a glimmer of hesitation.

"_It was you…"_

Slow, urgent, honest and raw.

She knew how he felt about her now. She knew because it was the same way she felt about him. And now, after everything that had happened, she was determined to make him see that they could be together.

No! She wouldn't let him push her away…even if it _was_ for her own good.

_

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Thoughts anyone? I'm just dying to hear what you all think...


	3. Chapter Two

_

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Chapter 2

_Okay Liz. It's now or never!_

The lunch bell sounds as masses of Liz's classmates muddle through each other toward the courtyard of Roswell High. Hurriedly searching the large crowd of people in the hall, she scans back and forth looking for Max.

Finally she catches sight of him.

She weaves through a group of her fellow classmates in a hurry to catch him before Michael or Isabel got a hold of him. She might never get a chance to talk to him alone if that happened.

Breathing a sigh of relief when she catches up to him, she grips her books closer to her chest nervously.

"Max!" she calls in anticipation.

Hearing his name in the din of the lunch crowd, Max turns around to face her. Once he notices it's her who's calling his name he stops and shoves his hands in his pockets.

"Hey," he greets with a shy smile.

"Hey."

"What's up Liz? Is everything ok?"

She helplessly struggles for the right words, "Um, yeah. I was just wondering if, uh, you could…

_God! This was so much easier in my head!_

"Liz?" his voice holds a level of amusement. He'd never seen her so speechless before…not even when he'd told her he was from another planet.

He didn't know what…if _anything_…was wrong. She certainly sounded unsure of herself. But then that look in her eyes, and the way she seemed to be drinking in his appearance told him something completely different all together. It was something he had trouble describing, almost as if she knew exactly what she wanted, and she was determined to get it.

"Liz?" he asks again with a smile. His voice this time pulls her out of her daze as she brings her eyes up to focus more clearly on his.

"Liz, are you ok?"

"Hmm?" shaking her head sharply to pull her thoughts and her courage together, "Yeah sorry. I was just thinking."

"About what? You were about to ask me something before you zoned out on me," he lightly teases and she laughs in slight embarrassment. Looking back up at him she's rewarded by one of his rare and precious grins. Her gaze softens at the sight and suddenly she becomes surer of herself.

She was determined to see more of those looks from him.

"Max, could we meet up later? I really need to talk to you."

Turning slightly more serious, Max looks at her, "I don't know Liz. I'm not sure that's such a good idea…not with everything that's been going on lately. I mean, I thought we agreed to lay low for awhile."

"Yeah, I know we did. But nothing suspicious has happened, and it's been over a week now since you healed me. I know you're worried Max, but I don't think we'd be risking anything by acting like normal teenagers...do you Max?"

Staring down at her he realizes he's barely heard a word she's said. He'd been completely captivated almost instantly by her eyes, and her lips. He'd imagined thousands of times what it would be like to kiss her. And thousands of times he'd been mesmerized by the way her mouth moved when she talked or smiled. But never before had he been so entranced with her standing right in front of him.

When finally his mind shifts back to the situation at hand, he can't remember why they're standing here. "Please Max?"

_Please Max? What is she asking me about again? Oh wait that's right!_

Trying to act as casually as possible he nods and agrees, "Ok Liz. Sure."

He feels his chest tighten at the look and sigh of relief she gives.

_Whatever this is about, it must be pretty important_

"Great! Well my shift tonight is over at 7:30. So, meet me at the Crashdown later?"

"I'll be there."

_I'll be anywhere you need me Liz_

Drawing her bottom lip up under her teeth, she draws attention over toward the lunch crowd. "Well, I guess I better get going. You know…before Maria sends out the search party."

Max can't help but chuckle a little at the thought of Maria dragging Alex around campus looking for her.

"Yeah, I should go too. Michael and Isabel are probably wondering where I am." Looking around him he realizes that he hadn't even noticed that they were the only two people left in the hallway. Returning his attention to Liz he watches as she slowly starts to leave, "See you later Liz."

"Yeah…later," she smiles excitedly before walking around Max and heading toward the courtyard. Following her with his eyes, Max can't help but watch her as she walks away to meet up with her friends. It seemed like forever ago that he was afraid to do more than watch Liz from a distance. Sometimes it was unbelievable to even him that he was finally able to talk to her about who he really was.

Sure Michael and Isabel were nervous about the ramifications. But Max always knew that he could trust Liz with the truth.

He loved her.

He'd loved her since the 3rd grade. He'd known it instantly. The first time he saw her he'd felt like a part of him that he'd been missing had finally been returned.

But he'd always kept his distance, for her sake mostly.

He was too afraid that being close to her could somehow put her in danger. But now everything was different.

The rules had changed.

And even though they couldn't be together just yet, Max was resolved to do whatever it took to find a way to be with her. Liz Parker was his whole purpose. He didn't know why or how he knew that the first day they met. But it was true just the same.

Liz meant everything to him…

He knew he loved her…

He knew he wanted her…

Michael and Isabel knew it too. That's what scared them most about Liz Parker…that she might care for him as much as he cared for her. It scared them both that she had the power to turn their trusted leader upside-down with just one smile. But what they probably feared most were the possibilities…

And now that Liz knew the truth, things could be different. He'd never been surer of that fact than he was just now…when he'd seen that look in her eyes.

That flickering passion mixed with longing that he'd read in their depths was unmistakable.

She wanted him too…

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_Thoughts anyone?_


	4. Chapter Three

_**Journal Entry -- September 29, 1999**_

_I know it's rare that I'd write in this journal before dark. Usually I obey my daily ritual of finishing out the day then recording it and all its quirky eventualities. But today is different. Today is the day I finally suck up all my courage and tell Max how I feel. Normally, confessions of this nature are limited only to the pages of this journal…and Maria of course. But it's time I stand up for what I want._

_And what I want is Max Evans…_

* * *

Since her conversation with Max at lunch, Liz had been a constant ball of nervous energy. While her shift tonight at the Crashdown had helped to preoccupy her brain, she couldn't help the growing anxiousness in the pit of her stomach. 

It's almost 7:30…Max will be here any minute.

Walking from the kitchen to the floor of the restaurant she's pulling at her uniform, trying to remove her apron gracefully when she notices Maria headed straight for her.

"Okay Chica. So what do you say…my shift's over in an hour. Wanna catch a movie at the Cineplex?"

"Oh! Yeah not tonight Maria."

"Not tonight? What you got something better to do? Come on its Friday night!"

Laughing at Maria's typical exuberance Liz explains, "Yeah I know, but I kind of already made plans…"

"Ahhh…you made plans? And why am I just now hearing about this…HELLO? Who's your best friend in the whole world?"

Off Liz's answering embarrassed laugh, Maria eggs her on, "…Spill it sister! So who is this mysterious, lucky and totally undeserving guy?"

Just as Maria is about to shamelessly pump Liz for information, the sound of the bell above the door immediately announces the arrival of another customer.

Eagerly searching the entrance, Liz smiles in her excitement once she sees Max walking in. Their eyes instantly meet as he slowly walks toward her. The anxious feeling in her chest is quelled when he smiles tenderly at her…his eyes fixed on her intently.

Noticing Liz's obvious exit from reality, Maria turns to see what she finds so intriguing. Seeing Max slowly closing the distance between them, she immediately understands. Laughing in disbelief she turns back to her friend as they share a look.

"Now I understand…Planet Max is calling. You know I expect a FULL report later!"

"Absolutely!" Liz nods her head for emphasis.

Arching her in head in satisfaction, Maria walks off briskly as Max approaches.

Liz smiles tenderly at her friend as she leaves; she knows that Maria isn't comfortable about this whole situation. But the fact that she's able to set her fears for her friend aside and give her this time alone with Max makes Liz smile.

Of course it helped that Maria had finally accepted that nothing she could say could change Liz's mind…they'd already had _that_ conversation.

Refocusing her attention, Liz's eyes follow Max's every movement; it was as if by simply watching him walk toward her she was entranced. She involuntarily smiles up at him as the corners of his mouth slightly lift in greeting.

"Hi," he smiles slightly as he stops to stand in front of her.

"Hi."

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	5. Chapter Four

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"So…you wanted to meet me?" Max starts.

"Yeah, um…why don't we go upstairs and talk?" Meeting his eyes she notices a look of slight nervousness in his stare.

_Was he afraid of being alone with her? Maybe he wouldn't need as much persuading as she'd originally thought. _

Silently thrilled at that thought, she suddenly realizes that she should probably say something to put him more at ease. "It's a little distracting down here…not the greatest place to talk you know?" she finally adds by way of an explanation.

Nodding his agreement, he follows her lead through the kitchen and up the back stairs. When finally they enter her apartment, she motions him to follow her through the hallway as she leads them to her bedroom.

Realizing her intended destination, Max suddenly isn't so sure he should follow her.

_Could he be alone with her in her bedroom and still somehow hide the yearning he was barely managing to suppress. As it was, he honestly wasn't sure how he'd managed this long without pulling her into his arms and kissing her breathless… _

"Uh, Liz? Are you sure your parents won't mind us, you know…"

Quickly dispelling his fears she answers, "Oh, no don't worry. They're in Santa Fe visiting some relatives. They won't be back until tomorrow afternoon."

_Oh God. Somehow that doesn't make me feel any more comfortable with this!_ His mind screams.

This REALLY wasn't doing anything for his self-control.

_Okay. You can handle this Max. She probably just needs help on homework or something…_

But then again he couldn't rationalize why _she'd_ need help with anything! This was Liz Parker he was talking to…Roswell High's greatest student EVER!

His eyes follow her as she grabs a change of clothes from atop her bed. Motioning to her uniform she tells him, "I've got to get out of this uniform. I'll be right back. Just make yourself comfortable."

Nodding his understanding, he watches mutely as she disappears into the bathroom.

_Okay. Great! Now I'm ALONE in Liz Parker's bedroom. When will the torture stop?_

Shoving his hands nervously into his front jeans pockets, he slowly paces the floor looking for something to keep his mind in check.

Slowly walking about the room he smiles at the simplicity of the décor. He'd never been up in her bedroom before, but he never doubted how clean and organized it would be.

_She definitely had it together_

Making his way over to her dresser, he reaches out and thumbs a framed picture of her and Maria.

_Friends to the end those two_…he thinks with a grin.

To the right of that was another picture of Liz, Maria and Alex all huddled together smiling. This one he recognized; it was from last years Homecoming Dance. Smiling fondly he recalls why that night still lingers in his mind.

He'd only gone to the dance because Isabel had dragged him and Michael there with threats to dream walk them both for weeks if they didn't. He immediately agreed after that.

He wasn't too comfortable with the idea of his sister walking around in his subconscious when most of his waking and sleeping moments were filled with images of Liz…

He and Michael were so uncomfortable at the gathering that they'd stuck to the sidelines all night. But from his spot against the wall…Max had a perfect view of Liz. He'd never forget the way she looked that night…she glowed in her deep burgundy colored slip dress. And even though he couldn't count the times he'd almost asked her to dance that night…he'd always lost his nerve.

Still smiling at the memory he turns around lazily and continues to move about her room. Stopping in front of Liz's desk, Max is caught off guard when he catches a glimpse of another photograph lying across an open book. The photo had obviously been looked at a lot; the once smooth surface was slightly worn.

Gingerly lifting it up to get a better look at it, his gaze immediately changes to one of tender surprise when he realizes what he's found. His look quickly softens at the image of him and Liz as children out on a playground. While he didn't _remember_ this photograph or that day, he definitely recognized the little boy sitting across from her as himself.

The little girl beside him wore a dark blue dress covered in tiny white polka dots. She stood slightly bent over as she reached to hand the little boy sitting in front of her a single handpicked daisy. The little boy extends his arm to accept the gift, his eyes trained on her bright smile.

_Who'd taken this photograph? How could he not remember this? _

It was so beautiful to him…and important! The image of the two of them together, even as kids in the grass was…incredible. He absentmindedly traces the flower between the children with his finger.

_This was a memory he desperately wanted! They couldn't have been more than nine or ten here…_

"I'll be out in just one second Max!" he suddenly hears Liz call from the other side of the bathroom door.

Roughly torn from his reverie, his head jerks up in surprise at her words. Desperately trying to find his voice he slightly manages a soft answer, "Sure Liz. No rush."

Sighing, he lifts his hand and rubs it through his hair absently as he moves to return the photo he's holding. Carefully replacing the precious memento, his gaze is quickly drawn to a crumpled sheet of paper sticking out of one of her books on the desk.

Taking the rumpled object in his hand, he carefully slides it out of the book.

His breath catches in his throat as he realizes what Liz has had in her possession all of these years…

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_Guesses anyone:oP_


	6. Chapter Five

_**Author's Notes:** Hey everybody! To those of you who have reviewed and emailed me regarding this fic...thank you for your kind comments and interest. I'm really glad that you're enjoying the story :o) Now...on with the show!

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How did she…**where** did she…?_

Max couldn't believe what he was holding.

_How on earth had Liz ever found this? Why had she kept it all these years and not told him? _

He just couldn't believe this…

"Max?" he heard her whispered voice float across the room. Still shocked he slightly turned toward the sound of her sweet voice. Lifting his head to meet her eyes he tries to think of a way to express what he's feeling, but he's lamely left without anything to say.

Watching him from across the room, Liz easily picks up that something is amiss. At the sound of her voice he'd turned slightly toward her, but too much of his back was still facing her, she couldn't see what had him so speechless. Her eyes quickly scan the contents on her desk, trying to find the answer.

_Oh God…the picture. I thought I put that away! _

Ever since the day Max healed her, Liz had felt the need to be close to him. She'd searched through everything she owned and tried to find anything that would remind her of him. And because she'd immediately thought of that photo taken of them when they were kids, ever since then she'd carried it with her everywhere she went.

That photo was special to her.

"Max?" her voice slightly quivered in her nervousness. "Are you alright?"

She slowly steps toward him until she's standing just behind him. Still unable to say anything, Max simply turns to face her.

"Liz…" he whispers. The desperation in his voice draws her attention downward to what he's holding in his hands. Realization dawns as her cheeks redden in embarrassment and her eyes refuse to meet his. Her secret was out.

"Liz…where did you…how long have you had this?"

_Well, he doesn't **sound** mad. That's a good thing…_

"I, uh…I've had it since the day you threw it in the trash," her words come out shakily.

"Since…?" his voice registers his shock. "Liz, I drew this in the third grade. Right after I was adopted."

Nodding her head she answers quietly, "I know."

"You've had this all this time?" his eyes begging her for an explanation. "Why?"

Sucking in her breath she slowly reaches out to finger the paper he's holding. Determined to explain this to him, she musters all her courage and smiles tenderly. "Do you remember when you drew this? The Evans' had just adopted you and Isabel. You'd only been in school a few weeks. I remember thinking, how unfair it was that you were so sad all the time. I didn't understand how you felt, not until the day Mrs. Hardy told everyone in the class to draw pictures of our families for our parents."

Max was captivated by the softness in her voice, and the gentleness of her touch in his hand. He remained completely silent and watched her in amazement as he listened to her speak. Looking down at the drawing they were both holding he remembered how conflicted he felt as he'd colored it years ago.

There were four figures drawn in bright colored crayon. The figures intended to be his mom and dad stood hand in hand at one corner. The crayon lines that were Isabel stood a little further from them, her hand out to meet their mom's. Finally the last figure was his representation of himself, standing alone at the page's center. Above him a blanket of dark black sky and outlined white stars almost seemed to swallow him up.

"This is what you drew," Liz's soft voice crept into his thoughts. His eyes meet hers as he nods solemnly.

"I wanted to go home. I didn't even know where home was. But for some reason, I just knew I belonged…somewhere else," he tries to explain. Nodding her understanding she takes the drawing from him and holds it against her chest. She presses it tightly over her heart as Max swallows the lump in his throat as he watches her reaction to his words.

"I knew you belonged here." Smiling up at him she fights the falling tears she feels slip down her cheek. The look of intensity he bestows upon her at that moment is only bested by the touch of his hand on her skin as he gently wipes at her tears.

"I tossed that drawing in the trash on my way out of class. I didn't think my new parents would like it. Why did you take it?" His voice is deep and husky with emotion.

"I don't know really. I watched you throw it away on your way home, and after you left I reached over and picked it up. I just couldn't let it go. Even though we were just kids, it became important to me because it was yours. And I guess I just really wanted to be able to have something of yours for myself." Surprised by her answer, he grins down at her and holds her face up to look at him with a finger under her chin.

"And why would having something of mine be important to you Liz?" His tone is one of mixed emotion, desperation and longing but not without a hint of playfulness. A feeling of sheer happiness radiates through him when she smiles and rests her hand over his heart.

_How did he have this power over her? It was as if everything she felt about him instigated some deeper change within her. _

Her lips are just a breath away as she draws small lazy circles on his chest with her finger, the sensation driving him crazy. Raising her other arm she gently strokes the nape of his neck.

"Liz…?" his voice is shaky as he tries to contain the overwhelming urge to press her firmly against him.

"Max…there's something that I've kept to myself for a long time, and now, I just need to say it and get it out in the open, okay?" she says softly, a gentle affection lacing her voice.

Once again unable to find his voice he simply nods his understanding. His eyes lower instinctively to her lips as she closes the small distance between them. Waiting in sweet anticipation, he realizes her intent and a small smile pulls at the corners of his mouth, his eyes drift shut.

Max gently tightens his embrace around her waist and pulls her closer against him as her lips softly brush against his. The whisper of her kiss steals his breath and makes his heart leap in his chest.

_This was heaven. _

The soft prodding of her lips and the warmth of her body tucked tightly against his, stirs an unfamiliar force inside of him that makes the urge to pull her closer impossible to fight.

Pulling her closer into him his lips close over hers and he deepens their kiss. She whimpers into his mouth, and the soft pleasurable sound wreaks havoc on his dwindling self-control. Drawing her even closer, he moans softly at the sensation of her hand coursing over his back and her fingers moving through his hair. His arms gently pull her flush with his chest and his hands run along the silk of her skin until they're lying at her waist, just underneath her blouse.

His fingers slowly stroking the skin at her back causes her to grasp at his shoulders as she senses a weakness in her knees. Carefully supporting her against him he resumes his exploration of her body until finally one arm supports her at her waist, and his other hand is lost in her hair and gently messaging her head. Using the hand he's positioned in her hair he tilts her head toward him until he's perfectly lost in the sweetness of her mouth once again.

Gripping one another, the intensity of their kiss grows. Totally lost in her, and completely convinced that he's caught in another one of his fantasies, Max savors the taste of her as if its his last. He'd waited years to hold her this way, and now that he had her in his arms, he didn't want to let her go.

Liz was utterly lost to the pleasurable sensations that Max was creating inside her. This was so much better than any of her dreams. The strength with which he cradled her against him was driving her crazy. The only thing she could think of that was more maddening was the way she could feel his heart pounding in his chest and the way his muscles moved beneath her touch. He was so firm beneath her and yet so gentle in the way he touched her.

The whimpering and moaning increases along with the fierce intensity of their embrace, until their minds form a connection through the haze of their euphoria. Suddenly Max gently tightens his hold on her body as he is hit with a wave of unfamiliar images…

**_He sees himself as Liz had seen him as a young boy, walking away from a school bus with Isabel, their hands entwined tightly in fear the way they often did when they were just kids. He sees the way she'd made notice of every move he made on the playground during their playtime in grade school. Vibrant colors coupled with overwhelming emotions gives rise to another rush of images, as he relived their time in junior high school through her eyes. Suddenly he sees himself back in the 6th grade when on Valentines Day he'd received an elaborately decorated valentine. The shared images that they experienced brought the event flooding back to him now. He remembered how he'd walked into the classroom to find the beautifully crafted valentine lying atop his desk; written fancily over the lacy material were two words: Be Mine. Looking back now, he remembered how that event marked him deeply, and how he'd never really known who was responsible for the cherished object. Now, he knew who'd sent the small treasure that had made him blush that day…it had been Liz._**

Suddenly their connection grows stronger as the knowledge he was gaining through their shared images propels his desire to unknown limits. Grasping deftly at her waist he pulls her body even closer against his…but he can't seem to bring her close enough. His lips suckle hers in a desperate attempt to ease the growing ache his body cried release for. But their plea for more intimate contact only managed to heighten their connection.

**_The maelstrom of emotions that pulls at his mind overwhelms his senses as he begins to feel her projection of the sensations he's inflicting on her body. Pure passion and intoxicating desire emerge most prominently from her mind. The brightness of her rich amber aura permeates his being, until he instinctually feels his own emerald aura merge with hers, and suddenly he's pulled back into her memories. He's hit with images from more recently as he sees himself walking through the halls between classes, pictures of him sitting quietly as he concentrates at his desk in class, and later at the Crashdown. The waves of emotions that accompany those visions make his heart pound. He feels the desire he somehow managed to stir in her flowing in waves._**

His skin tingles with warmth in response to what he's witnessed and he releases a breathless gasp as he gently disentangles himself from their kiss. Looking at her tenderly, Max pushes the hair from her face gently. The look he sends Liz nearly causes her to throw away any remaining semblance of control. His smoldering gaze is telling her everything she needs to know, and ever wanted to hear from him.

But regardless, she still needed to hear him promise to stop pushing her away; she was resolved to persist until he did.

"The valentine?" his voice nearly cracks in emotion, "That was you?" Still trying to catch his breath after their mind blowing kiss, he asks her breathless, "Why didn't you ever tell me?"

_Why hadn't she ever told him how she felt? He'd spent his entire life pining for her, why hadn't he ever known how much she cared for him? _

But then he realized something extraordinary that he'd somehow overlooked before. Her flashes told him that she'd recognized him from the first time they saw each other. Just like he was drawn to her the second he saw her in the 3rd grade…she'd singled him out as well.

_How and why could they do that? _

"I guess for the same reason you never told me how _you_ felt." Her eyes nervously dart back and forth as she searches for his reaction. She wanted to make him see that she was just as scared as he was. "I was afraid you didn't feel the same way. And even if you did, I didn't know that I could ever explain why I felt so strongly that you were the one. I mean…we were just kids Max."

Pausing for a brief moment, she continues to speak more quietly, "Max, the way I'm drawn to you…it's something I've never had an answer for. From the second I saw you when we were kids, my connection to you was instant, undeniable. It's been with me for so long now, that I've just stopped trying to fight it."

Max had spent his whole life waiting to hear her speak to him this way. He could have never imagined that telling Liz the truth about him could ever feel so good. As he looked down into her beautiful brown eyes, he realized just how much he would be willing to sacrifice to keep her safe.

Risking everything, including the normalcy his secret allowed him, was a small price to pay for healing her. If saving her life meant that he would be hunted down for the rest of his life by every single government agency on the planet, then he would gladly live the rest of his life as a hermit.

_She was everything. _

…_But was his love for her enough? _

The simple fact of the matter was that he didn't know anything about who he was or why he was here. His life was dangerous, too dangerous. And he loved her too much to ever put her safety at risk.

His overwhelming need to protect her…at any cost…even his own detriment…was too strong. Dropping his head away, he lets his arms fall from her body dejectedly.

"You have to fight it Liz," he barely manages through gritted teeth. He couldn't believe he was saying these things.

Missing the warmth of his arms around her she brings her arms up to wrap around her middle. "Max?" Her confusion and hurt are amplified ten-fold as she struggles to get him to look at her.

_This couldn't be the end…they were only finally just beginning…

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_**I shamelessly crave feedback :oP**_


	7. Chapter Six

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"Liz…I…it's not safe." His voice is small and unsure. So much so that Liz can't help but wonder if he's trying more to convince her or himself that what he's saying is true. Carefully he keeps his eyes from hers.

_He could barely manage to say this; if he had to look at her right now he'd never be able to continue. _

"Sheriff Valenti won't stop until he's found something; proof that I'm not completely…human. And I just couldn't live with myself if anything ever happened to you. I _won't_ put you in danger Liz. I _won't_ risk you being hurt." A brief moment of silence is followed by his nearly inaudible confession, "I love you too much to ever do that Liz."

Her eyes shoot up those last softly spoken words. She could feel tears collecting as she settles her eyes on his.

His eyes burned with affection for her, but she also saw the fear hidden in their depths. He was terrified that somehow being close to him would cause her pain. Nodding her understanding, but still refusing to accept his judgment, she gathers her strength and tells him in the most confident tone she can muster, "Max, I want to show you something."

Looking deeply into his eyes she smiles tenderly when all he can do is nod in agreement. She reaches out and takes his hand in hers before leading them through her window and onto the balcony. The air held a chill, but the breeze was calm and the stars shone brightly in the dark sky; as if each glimmered in a collective brilliance like a thousand diamonds suspended in the black atmosphere.

Pulling him by the hand she leads him over to a lawn chair, "Here, sit down."

Confused but intrigued, he sits down in the chair and watches as she steps away to look for something. A moment later he watches as she walks back to him; she's clutching a black book against her chest.

Walking back to him, Liz quickly takes a seat beside him before pulling her journal away from her chest and handing it to him. Taking it in his hands he asks, "What is this?"

Averting her eyes shyly she admits quietly, "Max, I've had a lot of time to think since the day you healed me. And lately, what I've thought about most is how you've made me feel. Not just because you trusted me with this truth you've guarded so carefully all these years. But because you trusted in me enough to risk your secret being discovered. I can't tell you what that means to me."

His brown eyes are watching her intently and so she tells him softly, "I want to return that trust Max. And this is the best way that I could think of to do that." Her gesturing over at the book he holds in his hands is meant to alleviate some of her nervousness.

"Since I was a little girl, I've kept a journal. Everything I experience…everything I feel, I write about in _that_ book. And…" her face becomes slightly flushed in her sudden embarrassment, "…a lot of my entries…are about you."

Max can't hide his surprise at her admission. He's somewhat speechless but he also can't suppress the widening grin that's forming over his lips. Bowing his head in an act of irresistible shyness, "I, uh…Liz, I don't know what to say." Gesturing down at the journal he asks, "Are you sure about this?"

Smiling slightly she nods her head, "Yes. I want you to know me the way you've let me know you."

Touched by her honesty and bravery, he smiles over at her and reaches his hand out to cup her cheek. The warm sensation of his hand over her skin causes her to press her cheek more fully into him. Opening her eyes to finally settle on his, she watches as his eyes darken in his growing desire.

_How could she ever deny herself this attention? She had to find a way to make him understand. She simply couldn't survive without being this close to him._

Liz can't control the sigh she hears escape her own lips when she feels the soft trail his fingers leave over her skin. His fingers move gently over her cheek and brush a lock of hair from her face. Looking back up into his eyes she smiles tenderly when she lightly touches the journal, "Go ahead. Open it," she mutters quietly.

Her soft words bring him back from the daze he'd experienced while lost in her eyes. Touching her one last time, he lowers his hand away from her and returns his attention to the small book she'd given him. Opening it he settles on a random entry before concentrating on the written words.

This one seemed to be dated just a few weeks before he'd healed her…

_**August 14, 1999**_

_**Today I caught him looking at me again. I didn't mind of course, how could I? He was so shy about it; but the sheer warmth that radiated through to my toes at that look was enough to keep me going for the rest of the week. Oh, how it must feel to be nestled against him. His arms, his chest…I just want tuck myself into his embrace and nuzzle my face between his shoulder and the crook of his neck. I let myself fantasize what it would be like in that spot, and I ache to feel the steady beat of his heart against my breast. Oh gosh, I should join a support group or something: 'Hi I'm Liz, and I'm a Maxaholic!' **_

_**Everyday some part of me wishes he'd just forget all about logic, sweep me up into his arms and kiss me breathless. But then I remember that's one of the things about Max that I love so much, the way his logical mind works through even the tiniest of problems. Nothing is insignificant to him, and no one is unimportant. **_

…_**His is the purest heart I've ever known…**_

Max was almost breathless upon reading her entry.

_These were the things she guarded so secretly and kept only for herself? Liz wanted to curl herself into his body? She fantasized about him holding her? She loved his mind? She thought he had a pure heart? _

Closing his eyes he tries to get control of his breathing, "Liz…" he whispers out hoarsely.

Liz Parker was certainly the most precious treasure in his life.

_**September 25, 1999**_

**_I need to find a way to tell him everything. I can't bear hiding the truth about my feelings anymore! I have to tell him. But for some reason, everything I think to say doesn't seem adequate. I've felt so many things for so long, that I'm just not sure there's any one way to explain to him how much I need him. Somehow the words 'I Love You' don't even seem like enough to express the way I feel. _**

_**September 27, 1999**_

_**… It's been almost a week now since that day in the Crashdown, and amazingly, somehow I've felt incredibly drawn to Max. Like a moth to a flame, I'm just unconsciously connected to him; it's a connection that seems stronger now than it ever did before. In the day, when I know he's far away, and even at night in my dreams: I feel him. I can't control this feeling…this urge to just curl up into his arms and wrap myself around him. **_

**_And the more I fight these feelings harbored deep in my soul, the more I realize that I don't want to fight them at all. I want to be consumed by them. I want to be consumed by him… Max Evans. _**

Max is so completely lost in the words he's reading he doesn't even sense the way his body has begun to quiver.

_The things she thought about him were so unbelievable. Never in all of his dreams could he have hoped for a love so honest and pure. He never thought anyone could ever feel that way about him. The wonderful excitement of it all literally stole his breath. _

His head was dizzy with need and his heart pounded hard in his chest as if it were ready to explode from all the sensations his body was experiencing.

_How could just a few words cause such a physically intense reaction inside of him? _

Turning slightly to face her, his erratic breathing is somewhat quelled when he sees the tears welled in her eyes.

"Max? Please say something."

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	8. Chapter Seven

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Smiling tenderly and reaching over he urges her closer. Cradling her face in his palms; with his thumbs he wipes at the tears that have begun to slip from her eyes. Gently pulling her into him, his eyes automatically slip shut as he brushes her lips with his.

Their kiss starts slow but before long grows in its intensity. Soon Max is devouring her with a passion so powerful it sends her soaring toward the heavens. Gradually decreasing the forceful pressure of his lips on hers, he carefully caresses her lips against the softness of his own. Hesitantly pulling his lips from hers he whispers almost reverently, "Thank you."

She releases a gasp in an attempt at recuperation from the exhilarating kiss they'd just shared.

"For what?" she whispers curiously.

"For showing me how you feel, for wanting to be with me as much as I've wanted to be with you."

"Max…I've felt this way for so long. I don't know how to live without it. Since that day in third grade, I've felt drawn to you. Like…a part of me wasn't complete until that day. I know it sounds crazy. We were so young then. How could I possibly feel…?"

"Like you'd found your soul mate?" he interrupts carefully.

Looking up at him in surprise she nods her agreement and questions, "How did you…"

"I felt it too. Still do," he whispers.

Her eyes begin to tear again in understanding and comprehension. "Max. I know we've talked about this before. And, we agreed we couldn't be together." She pauses for a moment and almost sobs her next request, "But after everything we've learned about each other tonight…and everything that's happened…please don't ask me to pretend I don't feel this way? I can't do it anymore. It hurts too much."

She pleads with him in a voice that creates a suffocating tightening in his chest. Dropping the journal to his side, he lowers to his knees and faces her. Reaching up he cradles her face in his healing hands.

"Liz, I want so much to believe that this could be normal." His voice is raspy with emotion.

Quickly interrupting him she tells him determinedly, "I don't care about normal."

Completely humbled by her words, he tries with growing difficulty to remain the voice of reason. "But you deserve normal Liz," even though he can feel his resolve slipping away.

Shaking her head in defiance she protests, "What I deserve is to be happy! Max if it weren't for you, I wouldn't even be here now! You saved me, and there's nothing normal about the way you did it. And I know you could never regret using your powers to heal me..."

"Never." He exclaims hoarsely; his voice was rough with emotion and conviction.

"But if it weren't for the fact that you're…special, we wouldn't even have this chance. How can we ignore the way things have turned out? Maybe this is the way things were always meant to be."

When he averts his eyes at her comment, she reaches out with her hands and brings his eyes back to look into hers. Her hands slowly and delicately caress his jaw.

"Max, I know you think our being together seems wrong, that it's too dangerous. But how will we ever know how right it can be if we never give it a chance?"

Smiling tenderly over at her he runs his palm over her silky hair. "Liz, I couldn't bear it if you got hurt. I'd never forgive myself…"

"I know Max. But you can't protect me in this. I need to be the one who decides who I put my faith in."

Pleasantly startled by her sudden show of authority, he grins cautiously. "Does that mean you've put your faith in me?"

Smiling and blushing she admits, "Yeah…a long time ago actually."

Gently pulling her toward him, he smiles solemnly before whispering, "That's good to hear, because you've had me practically in the palm of your hand since we were ten years old."

Then looking into her eyes, he tells her more seriously, "It's always been you Liz Parker…only you."

Smiling back at him she tries to contain her excitement. "Does that mean that you've decided…?"

"Liz…you've had me since the 3rd grade…being with you is a feeling that I, well it's a feeling that I just can't describe. It's all I've ever wanted." His voice is becoming hoarser with every sentence he speaks. "And if you're sure that being with me is what you want…then believe me when I say that I'll find a way to make it work."

"Really?"

Grinning up at her, he lets out a small teasing laugh meant to lighten the moment. "Besides…it took all the control I had not to pull you against me when you practically undressed me with your eyes downstairs."

Blushing uncontrollably she protests, "I did not!"

"Oh yes you did." His tone is lighthearted and playful. "It's nothing to be embarrassed about Liz…you can look at me like _that_ anytime you want!"

"Max Evans, what am I going to do with you?"

The laugh that escapes her when he stands and pulls her into the circle of his arms can't be helped. She's so happy she can't control the bright smile that breaks over her lips or the way she instantly encircles his neck with her arms and presses him closer.

His eyes sparkle in excitement and he grins over at her as he answers her quietly, "I don't know Liz Parker…but I'm sure you'll think of something." Leaning down into her he covers her lips with his. Firmly pressing her body to wrap around his they sigh at the sensation and savor this new closeness…

Tonight was the beginning of the rest of their lives…

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	9. Epilogue

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Journal Entry -- September 19, 2000_

_Today is the one-year anniversary of the day Max healed me in the Crashdown. I don't know what he has planned to celebrate, but I'm sure that whatever it is…I'm going to love it. Sometimes it's still hard for me to believe that I could be so lucky. I've found my soul mate, and he loves me more than I ever thought would be possible. _

_Max Evans has changed me. And as strange as it's been…I wouldn't trade any of it for the world. Everything I remember before he saved me seems somehow irrelevant…like it wasn't until that day that my life truly started. He completes me in every way. And he never lets me forget just how much I mean to him. His love is just one of the many gifts he's given me this last year, and with every day that we're together, I become more and more determined to follow him wherever he may go. Whatever happens…whatever dangers arise…whatever troubles we must face…there is one thing that I'm sure of. We will always be together._

…_.even if it means that I have to follow his cute little alien butt all the way to another planet…

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Author's Notes: Well ladies and gentlemen...this marks the very end of "Forever Took to Find". I certainly hope that you all enjoyed reading it...and from the bottom of my heart, Thank You to all of you who maintained your interest in this story. Thanks Again...and please don't forget to review with your thoughts and/or comments.


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